No I Am Not In The Bathroom

Before I start typing this story and for the sake of brain not jumping out of my head and running to a safer place I must say that you will become dumber for reading this, if you feel brave then godspeed...

Everyday I am constantly surprised by the lack of common sense that my suite mates possess. But, today might have been the topper.

Let me just toss out a hypothetical situation. Let's just say there is a person Deron who is in the bathing about to take a shower and has music playing inside of the bathroom. Then he hears a knock on the door. It is his suite mate hmm let's say Rony, and Rony asks "Hey man you in da bathroom?" To which Deron replies, "Well yeah." And then there is a pause until Rony knocks again and asks, "Eh yo is someone in da bathroom?" To which I... I mean Deron, yeah Deron sarcastically replied, "No, nobody is in here."

Then I heard the door open and Rony walked it and he was surprised to see another human being in the bathroom.

Now, if you are the kind of person who is knocking on a bathroom door and hear a voice on the other side who replies twice and it does not connect that, "Hey there might be a person in there." That is one thing, but if you are the kind of person who hears another person on the other side of the door say, "No, nobody is in here." and you go, "Phew, because I really had to go to the bathroom." And you open the door and are legitimately SHOCKED to see another person on the other side of the door. That is a whole different can of beans.

The day I begin to think like that I am probably going to have to pull a R.P. McMurphy and check myself into an insane asylum where I will become bitter rivals with Louise Fletcher circa 1975. (If you are not picking up on the Cuckoo's Nest references I do not really know how more clearer I can be.)

But that is seriously what it would boil down to. I would go crazy. There would be no telling what I would do. I could become a bathroom door knocking bandit. Entering only when I hear a voice on the other side declaring occupancy.

But then it could be opposite day. And that is the only logical argument that I can make for Rony.

So that would mean, "Yes, indeed I am currently in the bathroom." Actually means, "No, I am not in the bathroom."